Wednesday, June 25, 2008

My Last Name is Eltringham

Pronounced as it's spelled. El-tring-ham. People always mess it up, though. I've heard things like Ellingram...good attempt, I guess....Ectington...where'd that C come from...Etraham...all those letters in the middle are weird! Take them away...and Ellington....the great grandson of Duke, maybe?

Here are some I've never heard, but wish I had. If you're going to mess it up, go all out and try one of these:

*Mike Elk-lodge-stan
*Mike Elf-Drink-Tan
*Mike Elderly-Kringle-Cam
*Mike Ham-Dram-Stool
*Mike Elton-John-Wishes-His-Name-Was-Pam
*Mike Eltring-Flim-Flam-Wham-Blam-Sam-Bam-Cunningham (Sandler respect)
*Mike Ellafitzgerald
*Mike Elder-Wand-Pwned-Voldemort, Man
*Mike Smish-smashioes
*Mike El-Let-Me-Get-a-Moment-of-Silence-for-9/11-Right-Quick
*Mike Rubber Band Man, Wild as the Taliban/9 in My Right, 45 in My Other Hand/Who I'm Is?

When you mess up my name, at least do it big. A wise man, and I believe this was FDR, once said: Big shit popping...little shit stopping. Good night and good luck.


jake said...

I'm sorry.
I thought I got it right, but there was that moment of hesitation, that one nanosecond pause of labor which demeaned us both.

I'm 'a call you Paddington.

Greg said...

Hey Mike, I just had one more Eltringham f*ck up to add to your blog. Now that we share the same last name, I have experienced the multitude of mispronunciations of Eltringham. By far the funniest one came from an 8 year old in my summer school class. This kid, who attends another school, raises his hand and simultaneously says, "Ms. Electric Ham?" After opening my mouth and contemplating for a brief moment- this kid goes to another school and I will probably never see him again after the next couple of days- I decided on "Yes, what can I help you with?"
I don't know about you, but I sure am looking forward to the other mispronunciations that will inevitably follow this one. At least most of the mispronunciations I encounter come from 3rd graders.

Mike Eltringham said...

My senior year of high school, Mr. Rothell used to call me Electric Ham! Maybe they're related or something.